Being yourself.

I learnt a long time ago that being yourself is the best way to go about life. I let go of social anxiety and the need to please and be liked by everyone. But somehow Instagram still floors me. Trying to be yourself publicly is difficult. Can you ever be authentic on a platform that algorithmically favours perfection? Really difficult. I have realised that pushing your boundaries and trying something you’re afraid of reveals to you who you are. It shows you your spots of vulnerability. There’s a great anecdote I read somewhere in the depths of insta, if you’re walking down the street and someone comes up to you and says ‘ew, your purple shoes are weird,’ (paraphrasing here) but you’re wearing pink shoes, you will simply laugh and say alright then, and go about your day. But if someone says your pink shoes are weird, and you are wearing pink shoes, it has the potential to deeply hurt you. If you are strong and assured enough in who you are, then if someone regards you in a certain way it would not bother you, because you sit comfortably in the facts of who you know yourself to be, and you hear the insult as untrue as someone mocking the wrong shoe colour. That is the type of self-love I want to build. We are socialised to not take risks, to want to be liked, to mould ourselves, especially as women, to best fit our environment and best please those around us. Trying something new and sharing it is risky and it is scary. But it also shifts you. In a way, it makes you more sure of yourself. Well, I can’t say that yet. But hiding from the things you want to do to stay safe definitely doesn't make you more self-assured, I’ve been there. So, I'll take a lil bit of that exposure therapy. We’re all just trying to get to a place where if someone says they hate our purple shoes, you couldn’t care less, coz you know yours are pink and you know you love ‘em.